3 posts tagged “bar business”

Last night's bar adventure!

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JennyExiled

• So I've been at the bar by myself for 4.5 hours now. I would say I'm beyond bored, closing in on insanity with a slight detour into desp ...about 11 hours ago from txt
• First customer of the night and it's a crazy homeless woman. Awesome!about 11 hours ago from txt
• My best friend thinks I create drama. I think it just finds me. Case in point: My customer is currently involved in some sort of alterca ...about 10 hours ago from txt
• I think she's wearing Uggs.about 10 hours ago from txt
• She's outside smoking a cigarette and barking at the people who pass by. See? Who could make this shit up?about 10 hours ago from txt
• So I'm thinking, she's either going to leave quietly or kill me. Tough call.about 10 hours ago from txt
• She's in the bathroom. If she dies in there, I'm moving to Mexico. Tomorrow.about 10 hours ago from txt
• Oh, holy hell. She's NUTS.about 10 hours ago from txt
• Oh, god. Two crazies.about 10 hours ago from txt
• I don't think this night could get any weirder. Srsly.about 9 hours ago from txt
• Um. Yeah. So I was wrong.about 9 hours ago from txt
• I bartered for my life with a trash bag.about 9 hours ago from txt

Out. Of. Control.

Honest. I really do. Just in case it ever seemed like I didn't, now you know. =)

Clue 1: He's a young, clean-cut guy on his own.

Clue 2: He calls you "Ma'am." I've been called baby, sexy, good-lookin' and bitch by my customers, but only the cops call you "Ma'am."

Clue 3: He orders a Corona. I don't know why they don't mix it up, but in every Baltimore City liquor board hearing I have ever attended (both as a defendant and as an observer) that involved an undercover police cadet, s/he ordered a Corona.

Clue 4: He puts his department-issued $20 bill on the counter as he orders. Again, for some reason it's always a $20.

Clue 5: When you ask for ID (and I hope for your sake that you do), he will give you his real ID, not a fake.

Think fast and do the math. He's over 18, but under 21. Refuse service to save yourself a huge fine and an embarrassing Polaroid photo snapped with the cadet.

[NB: But don't be lulled by a couple. Occasionally they'll send a man and a woman in together.]